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Adult SMS Collection
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Can U Repeat This Fast...
Chandu K Chacha Ne Chandu Ki Chachi Ki Chut Chati To Chachi Chillayi,
Chutiye Chut Chaatna Chhod Aur Condom Chada Ke Chod...
El larki
AAHA
Adhi raat ko
AAHA
Jungle main
OHOO
Jhari k peeche
AHAA
Sub se chup k
AHA
Daba daba k
AHA
Chos chos k
OHOO
.
.
.
.
.
Aam kha rahi thi
AAHAHAH
Why are condoms only sold in packets of 3 and 12?
Because 3 are for young ppl like me (morning,afternoon, night)
n
12 for old ppl ,like u Jan,feb,mar,apr,....
Y dont Women keep Cell in dere shirts pocket??
Coz dere is No range near Mountains...
&
Y do men keep Cell in dere Pants Pocket....??
Coz dere is alwayz signal near Towers.......
aapka aaj ka rashifal-
1. fuddu kamo mein dhyan rahega,
2. lund pe pakad dheeli rahegi,
3. chut k darshan nirasha janak rahege,
4. aur koi apki gand mar sakta hai.
1 Sawal : Duniya ka sabse mushkil kaam kya hai ?
Jawaab : Soye huye pappu par condom chadaana !
TRY IT :
Lady:Doctor sahib mera pati sex nai karde
Doctor:aah goli lai javo te raat nu ik goli dudh ch de devo
10 din baad Doctor ohna de ghar halchaal puchan gya te os lady
da munda aya te os ne dasya k Mummy di Daddy ne eni fuddi layi
k mummy mar gayi,te meri Masi hospital ch hai, te sadi kamwali
di bund paat gayi hai,te main v lukya hoya va, te daddy garden
ch nanga fir rha hai te uchi-2 keh riha hai k aj msg padan wale di khair nahi.
A genie granted a man 2 wishes...
He asked for the best wine in the world and the best woman in the world...
He got the best wine and MOTHER TREASA !
Moral : Be specific !
Malik-main tumhare liye chudiya laya hu.
Naukrani-aap hi pehna djiye.
Malik-mujhe tumhara response pehle pata hota to,
main panty lekar aata.
'Katil lagta hai aadmi,
jab uske haath main TALWAAR hoti hai.
Us se bhi katil lagti hai AURUT,
jab uske badan pe na KURTA na SALWAAR hoti hai.'
Jatt fastfood te call karda hai-dakke wali kulfi hai?
Maneger'yes'
Jatt: bund ch laila.
5 min baad Jatt-'Dakke wali kulfi hai?'
Manager-'nahi'
Jatt:sarian bund ch lai betha en?
Mngr Calls police & tells about jatt
Police: kina time ho gya es gal nu?
Manager: sir 15-20 min hogey
Police: kulfian pighal gaian honian teri bund ch paiyan,hun dakke kad le..!
Baba bakrian chare bund bakre di mare.
bakra nassan nu kare baba dhakan nu kare.
bakra ro piya babe da cho piya.
baba pajj gaya bakra sms pad k hass peya
Wife: kaash main newspaper hoti dinbhar tumhare hathon me rehti
Hus: meri bhi yahi dua hai rab se issi bahane her din nayi nayi to milti
Schoolgirl: I do not want to go to the sex education class.
Teacher: Why not?
SchoolGirl: because someone told me the final exam would be oral.
Maine apko phone kiya to network bola, namaskar
pagal ki duniya me aapka swagat hai,
Aap jis pagal se iss waqt
baat karna chahte hain, uska
DIMAAG SWITCH OFF HAI.
Custmer: My wife needs a Bra but I don’t know d size.
Salegrl:Touch my breast n try to calculate.
Custmer: Oh I forgot she needs panties too!
Q. Why did God give men penises?
A. So they'd have at least one way to shut a woman up.
Q. What's the difference between a paycheck and your dick?
A. You don't have to beg a woman to blow your check.
Q. What are the small bumps around a woman's nipples for?
A. It's Braille for 'suck here'.
Q. What's the difference between your wife and your job?
A. After 5 years your job will still suck.
Q. What's the difference between a woman and a coffin?
A. You come in one and go in the...
Q : 2 homo ladke khubsurat ladki ko dekh kar kya bolenge ???
A : yaar ladki aisi hai to uska bhai kaisa honga ???
A couple had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the
husband always insisted on shutting off the light. Well, after 20 years
the wife felt this was ridiculous.
She figured she would break him out of this crazy habit. So one night,
while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session,
she turned on the lights. She looked down and saw her husband was holding a battery-operated leisure device...
a vibrator!
She went completely ballistic. 'You impotent *******,' she screamed at
him,'how could you be lieing to me all of these years? You better explain yourself!'
The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly:
I'll explain the toy . . . you explain the kids.'
A man had 'I LOVE YOU' tattooed on his dick.
He went home and proudly showed his wife.
'There you go again, trying to put words into my mouth',
she said.
BOSS to secretary: book my tiket for london,
aur suno mera naam 'D K BOSE' likhwana,
warna airport pe mera naam 'BhoseDK' announce hota hai....!
Husband: Did u have any boy friend befor our marriage?
:
:
:
:
:
main is khamoshi ko kya samjhu?
Wife: Abe mujhe gin to lene dde......
Woh Sunday ki shaam thi,
haath mein glass bhari jaam thi,
pilane wali jhakaas Raand thi
aur jab hosh aaya toh Police ka danda aur apni Gaand thi!
Gahk ik redi wale nu 'Han bae murge ki rate laye ne '
g 60 rupe 40rupe 10 rupe kilo . Gahk
'changa fir 10 rupe da pa de .redi wala pr sir 10
wale nu tan Aids a gahk o chal mai tan khana e aa
kehda ehdi bund maarni aa
Banta 1 gasti ko Rs1000 deta hai! Vo bhag jati hai,
Banta Akhbaar mein shpva deta hai, 1 ladki, Umr18,
Kad 5'3, jahan kahin b dikhe, Chod do, Paise dite hoye ne
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