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SMS Jokes Collection
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FATHER: How are your grades, son?
SON: Under water, Dad.
FATHER: Under water? What do you mean?
SON: They're below C level.
STUDENT: But I don't think I deserve a zero on this exam.
TEACHER: Neither do I, but it's the lowest mark I can give you.
Computor Teacher asks a kid wat r d two latest varjons of java?Kid Told 1)MARJAVA N 2)MITJAVA,Ishq me dil jaan b naam tere kar java java.
Pj of d yr-Jiska dil tut gaya hai uske pass genrl knwldge kyu nahi hota hai???Socho??Kyoki Jab dil hi tut gaya to ''G.K'' kya kare
A FAMILY SAW ''SHOLAY'' MOVIE
CAME BACK HOME AND HUSBAND ROMANTICALLY SAID TO WIFE
'' NACH BASANTI NACH''
CHILD ADDED
''NAHIN BASANTI IS KUTE K SAMNE MAT NACHNA''
1 punjabi 1 Sindhi or 1 PATHAN Dozakh main thae.or teenon ke khawahish the k woh zameen par ayeen. Akhir kaar un ko zameen par jany ke ijazat mil gaye but 1 shart par k woh zameen par ja kar koi khawi
Why can't u trust a woman ?
Ans : How can u trust something that bleeds for five days and does'nt die
Happiest man is on whose,
daughter's photograph is on femina cover,
son on india today,
girlfriend on playboy,
WIFE on missing coloumn of newspaper.
Thought for the Days!!!
if you call your mother as MUM...
What will you call Mother's younger
sis and elder sis?
Answer : MINMUM & MAXIMUM
Explain The word
"AUTOMATICALLY"
....Nahe pata
i'll xplain...
ager koi ganji ladki
auto mein bethi ho
to use kehte hain
auto_mein_takli:~$
Husband ne at 1st night opened the Ghunghat gave
Rs. 500 munh dikhayi. Wife ne kaha Tum mere Husband ho is liye leleti hoon
warna mai 2000 se kam nahi leti
Whose mother had the most painful delivery
Guess ?
Still Thinking.....
Ans: Sunny Deol
Why?
Becoz he himself said "Main nikla gadi lay kay"
Wife: Zara dheere karo na kyun TezGaam chala rahe ho ?
Maalgaadi chalao na.....................
Itne mein beta bed se neeche gira aur bola.........
Behanchod jo marji chalao par sawari ko to mat gi
Woman: Dr. sahab mujhe thode din bachha nahi chahiye.
Dr: Ye Condom le lo........
Woman: Ye pani ke sath lu ya doodh ke saath...
Dr: Kele ke saath!!!!!!!!!!!!!Osman
Teacher: "LOVE" kia Hai
Ali: Sir "L" ko pakar k "O" ko duba k "V" main Ghusa k jab "E" ki Awaz aye to usay "LOVE" kehtay hain.
I was cooking chicken.When added palak in it,the chicken stood up and started dancing and saying"Hum pe yeh kis ne hara rang dala,maar dala,Allah maar dala.
did u know what is mean by MAN
M=marvelous
A=and
N=nice
and the word WOMAN mean is
W=wanted
O=other
MAN=man
one day dog dancing madly on the merage of lion lion ask y r u dancing madly dog said i am also lion before merrage..
Husband:"Darling years ago u had a figure like a Coke bottle."
Wife:"Yes darling I still do but the only difference is earlier it was300ml and now it's 1.5 liter
BAAP BYTE SE ,
PEHLE TUM MUJH KO PAPA KAHTE THE AB DADY KUYN KAHTE HOO ,
KIYA WAJAH HIA ?
BYTE : PAPA KAHNE SE LIPSTICK JO KHARAB HOO JATE HAI
Teacher:-What is common between
KRISHNA,NABI,GANDHI& JESUS...?
SARDAR replied...."ALL ARE
bOrN ON GOVERMENT HOLIDAYS...!
behind every SUCCESSFUL woman, there is a SATISFIED man,but behind a SATISFIED woman there is an EXHAUSTED man...
A man to cardiologist, How dare u tell my wife that she has a cute Vagina, Doctor, stupid, i told her that she has acute Angina.
A boy and gal of 5th class asked teacher "kya chote bachoon ke bhi bache hoote
hain"? teacher nahin kabhi nahin " boy said to girl-dekha aur tu aise hi dar rahi thi"
Musharraf said to his mother. Ammi mari B.V , M.M.A walon sey meli hoi hai! Jab bhe kamray main jata hoon kehti hai wardi utaro.
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